Roast Station
Every Roast, Properly Filed.
625 roasts in the newsroom so far. This page is the real browse surface: paginated, filterable, and built to keep the archive readable instead of pretending to be a second homepage.
YC Demo Day: Ego Meter Hits Record Delusion
TechCrunch rounds up the standout startups whose investors say commanded $175M+ valuations in the hottest batch yet.
FIFA Banks $10.9B While Host Cities Get Zero
The audit shows FIFA's staggering tournament haul leaves hosts with bills and no sponsorships in sight.
Iran-US 'Understanding' Audit Flags Nuclear Shell Game
The world watches for a lasting agreement while the same old understanding buys time and zero accountability.
Education Dept Slashes Student Interest Rates by 1% — Enjoy It for Two Years
High defaults force a temporary crumb while the department pretends this fixes the debt trap it helped build.
Apple's Brazil App Store Lockdown Finally Cracks
Absurdity audit exposes how distribution control and competition only loosen when regulators force the issue.
Black Rain Falls After Drones Hit Moscow's Biggest Refinery
Residents complain while officials rebrand soot as 'atmospheric adjustment' from the ukrainian strike south-east of the capital.
Polymarket Wallets Turn Transparency Into Insider Trading Evidence
Prediction markets on geopolitics now come with public receipts that make suspicious trades impossible to ignore.
Culturistas Awards Audit Flags TV Return After Hit Debut
A successful parody show returns to television, proving culture needs another round of self-congratulation.
Knicks Owner Frames Sex Ban as Team Optimization
Jordyn Woods calls out the corporate euphemism while Karl-Anthony Towns stays engaged in December drama
Judge Decodes Life Sentences Into Corporate Gibberish
Three life terms running consecutively gets spun as meaningful punishment when the math already screamed 'never leaving.'
Starmer Spins Burnham's Makerfield Win Into Leadership Dead End
Labour's big plan: win the by-election, then pretend the leadership challenge never existed by pivoting to Manchester.
Audit Slams US Blockade as Iranian Tankers Cruise Past
Three loaded crude carriers treat the military line like optional signage while ship-tracking data keeps receipts.
Dangerous AI Models Audit: Hacking Capabilities Inevitable
Formal review finds advanced models will become the norm regardless of any safety pushback
Warsh Fed Debut Audit Finds Markets Stuck in Neutral
Traders refrained from action ahead of the decision, as if hesitation itself could validate the outcome.
Stanford Grads Pocket $11M for Hormone-Tracking Wearable You'll Pay to Use
Noninvasive my ass — meet the latest gadget that costs $369 upfront plus a fat subscription just to maybe tell you what your body already knows.
Ukraine's Logistics Lockdown Leaves Crimea Pump-Dry
Targeted attacks on Russian supply routes create gasoline shortages that turn Crimea’s invasion logistics into an expensive math problem.
Porsche Cranks Ego Meter to Fake Shift
MY27 Taycan throws in native NACS, bigger battery standard, and simulated e-shifts like that's peak engineering.
FIFA Ego Meter Spikes as Anyone Could Hijack the Stream
A researcher poked FIFA's internal platforms and found the keys to every World Cup broadcast sitting in the open.