The content on this site is satire. If you are offended, you are probably the target.

Desk 26 / 46 · Tech · August 15, 2026

Apple Trained a China Model With Alibaba

Apple Intelligence finally gets a Beijing stamp. The model is not Cupertino's usual one.

No way, Apple. You trained your own China model with Alibaba after years of saying the phone would just borrow someone else's brain, and now you want credit for being first foreign firm approved in Beijing. That's the pose. The features were missing on the shelf. The partner did the homework. Leave it in Cupertino.

More on the desk

  1. 01 · Sports

    Bezos Bought a Third of Liverpool and Skipped the Seat

  2. 02 · Finance

    Tesla Paid Musk $158 Billion at Giga Texas

  3. 03 · Politics

    Ryan Held Tesla Stock on the House Floor

  4. 04 · Finance

    Garg Asked for the Zoom-Firing Job Back

The list

If the next one lands, it shows up here.