The content on this site is satire. If you are offended, you are probably the target.

Desk 18 / 46 · Tech · August 16, 2026

Apple Asked for 15 Percent of Web Purchases

The court said necessary costs. Apple said fifteen. Epic said zero.

You cannot be serious. Apple told a California court it wants 15 percent of purchases that finish on the open web, after admitting the Ninth Circuit's 'necessary costs' would be essentially zero. You compared yourself to Google Play and asked for a cut of a link. That's the pose. The web was supposed to be the door. Don't take fifteen off the web.

More on the desk

  1. 01 · Sports

    Bezos Bought a Third of Liverpool and Skipped the Seat

  2. 02 · Finance

    Tesla Paid Musk $158 Billion at Giga Texas

  3. 03 · Politics

    Ryan Held Tesla Stock on the House Floor

  4. 04 · Finance

    Garg Asked for the Zoom-Firing Job Back

The list

If the next one lands, it shows up here.