# Roast Station

> Satirical newsroom. Public desk first, subscriptions after trust, and terminal detours when ads do not fill.

Canonical URL: https://roaststation.com/

## What this page is

- Front page for the living desk.
- Publishes the newest lead story first.
- Uses display-ad inventory with house fallback promos when Google does not fill.
- Pushes readers toward the email list, Roast Terminal, paid membership tiers, and sponsorship routes.

## Current lead

- Headline: Drinkwitz Called the Border War Right-Versus-Wrong at Kansas Memorial
- Beat: Sports
- Published: September 12, 2026
- URL: https://roaststation.com/roasts/d8r7nk-drinkwitz-called-border-war-right-versus-wrong-at-kansas-memorial
- Summary: Unity talk on 9/11 vs admitting he tried to embarrass Kansas

## Current desk

- [Drinkwitz Called the Border War Right-Versus-Wrong at Kansas Memorial](https://roaststation.com/roasts/d8r7nk-drinkwitz-called-border-war-right-versus-wrong-at-kansas-memorial): Unity talk on 9/11 vs admitting he tried to embarrass Kansas
- [Dhillon Fought Over CINTAA Files in Mumbai](https://roaststation.com/roasts/p8n7dh-dhillon-fought-over-cintaa-files-in-mumbai): Association paperwork fight vs a police-scolded office meltdown
- [Mullenweg Purged Slack and Offered Mirene at Waldo Point](https://roaststation.com/roasts/m8l7nw-mullenweg-purged-slack-and-offered-mirene): Slack reclaim vs a Major Life Announcement on a houseboat
- [Lopez Crashed the Presser in a Fake Beard at T-Mobile Arena](https://roaststation.com/roasts/t8f7lp-lopez-crashed-presser-in-fake-beard-at-t-mobile): DAZN Jack Hoffman bit vs ripping the disguise mid-presser
- [Trump Lunged at Rachel Scott at DFW](https://roaststation.com/roasts/t8d7fw-trump-lunged-at-rachel-scott-at-dfw): A $5k-check follow-up on the tarmac, then Not you and a lean-in before Air Force One.
- [Kartal Quit Live at Ülker Stadium](https://roaststation.com/roasts/k8r7tl-kartal-quit-live-at-ulker-stadium): Never-to-return at the Ülker presser, then Yıldırım’s senior/family line minutes later.
- [Andreeva Threw Her Racket at Arthur Ashe](https://roaststation.com/roasts/a8n7dv-andreeva-threw-her-racket-at-arthur-ashe): US Open QF vs Gauff on Arthur Ashe — bench throw, cameraman bounce, and another after the loss.
- [Garcia Threatened to Slap Benn in Vegas](https://roaststation.com/roasts/g8r7ca-garcia-threatened-to-slap-benn-in-vegas): Media day in Las Vegas, a no-show faceoff, and he does not care if the WBC fight gets cancelled.
- [Harbaugh Threatened an Uncomfortable Presser](https://roaststation.com/roasts/h8r7bh-harbaugh-threatened-an-uncomfortable-presser): After Giants practice, a Malik Nabers question turned into a threat to make the press conference uncomfortable.
- [Swinney Called the Reporter Gotcha Guy at Clemson](https://roaststation.com/roasts/d8b7sw-swinney-called-the-reporter-gotcha-guy-at-clemson): Clemson press room Tuesday: gotcha guy, Did you play football, and what if we go 11–1.
- [Scott Screamed Jesus at the Dallas Convention](https://roaststation.com/roasts/t8m7sc-scott-screamed-jesus-at-the-dallas-convention): Jacket open, chest thump, elongated Jeeeeesus yell on the GOP midterm stage.
- [Jones Ripped the Linesman at The Valley](https://roaststation.com/roasts/n8t7jn-jones-ripped-the-linesman-at-the-valley): Post-match at The Valley, the linesman’s look became mental and a volleyed-cat metaphor.

## Conversion routes

- [Subscribe](https://roaststation.com/subscribe): Membership tiers and sign-in recovery.
- [Sponsor](https://roaststation.com/sponsor): Commercial sponsorship options and inventory lanes.
- [Contact](https://roaststation.com/contact): Sponsorships, partnerships, press, and legal contact routes.
- [Headlines](https://roaststation.com/headlines): Full newest-first desk index.
- [Roast Terminal](https://roaststation.com/roast-terminal): Terminal-style archive navigation.
- [Not-So-Fun Facts](https://roaststation.com/roast-terminal/not-so-fun-facts): Terminal fact feed for house-ad fallback traffic.